An Open Letter to Kid Cudi and His Homies

First of all, are we still using the word homies?  You see I have a confession to make, I am not hip.  In fact, I am closer to needing a new hip than being hip.  My name is Dennis Gillan and I am a 53 year old Caucasian who never heard of Kid Cudi until last week and now I want to shake that young man’s hand for bringing the topic of mental health to the forefront.  I’m not talking one of those hand out, bodies apart handshakes.  I’m doing the full brother on brother handshake that includes the half hug and I am not letting go until he does. Quick backgrounder for square old farts like me, Kid Cudi is a rapper and apparently he is pretty darn good at it.  A quick check of his Twitter feed shows that he has 1.54 MILLION followers, move the decimal over some to get to my grand total of 149 followers.  Kid Cudi was born Scott Ramon Seguro Mescudi on January 30, 1984 in Cleveland and he is a certified star.  If you need to know more about this cat go here:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kid_Cudi  Now I am fairly certain that I am not in his core demographic group and I cannot sing/rap any of his tunes, but when he is better I want to meet him for real.  Why you ask?  Because Scott Mescudi had the balls to put this post on his Facebook page: 

Its been difficult for me to find the words to what Im about to share with you because I feel ashamed. Ashamed to be a leader and hero to so many while admitting I've been living a lie. It took me a while to get to this place of commitment, but it is something I have to do for myself, my family, my best friend/daughter and all of you, my fans. 
Yesterday I checked myself into rehab for depression and suicidal urges. 
I am not at peace. I haven't been since you've known me. If I didn't come here, I wouldve done something to myself. I simply am a damaged human swimming in a pool of emotions everyday of my life. Theres a ragin violent storm inside of my heart at all times. Idk what peace feels like. Idk how to relax. My anxiety and depression have ruled my life for as long as I can remember and I never leave the house because of it. I cant make new friends because of it. I dont trust anyone because of it and Im tired of being held back in my life. I deserve to have peace. I deserve to be happy and smiling. Why not me? I guess I give so much of myself to others I forgot that I need to show myself some love too. I think I never really knew how. Im scared, im sad, I feel like I let a lot of people down and again, Im sorry. Its time I fix me. Im nervous but ima get through this. 
I wont be around to promote much, but the good folks at Republic and my manager Dennis will inform you about upcoming releases. The music videos, album release date etc. The album is still on the way. Promise. I wanted to square away all the business before I got here so I could focus on my recovery.

If all goes well ill be out in time for Complexcon and ill be lookin forward to seeing you all there for high fives and hugs.

Love and light to everyone who has love for me and I am sorry if I let anyone down. I really am sorry. Ill be back, stronger, better. Reborn. I feel like shit, I feel so ashamed. Im sorry.

I love you,

Scott Mescudi

Now as a mental health advocate I disagree with him feeling ashamed, but who the hell am I?  Well since you asked I am a guy who buried two brothers to suicide, so you can now see why I admire Kid Cudi for “Manning Up” and going to get help.  Don’t believe me---go here:  www.dennisgillan.com and that’s right I wrote “Manning Up”!  It takes a real man to admit he is vulnerable and in our own vulnerability is where we find our strength.  I now speak professionally on my journey towards recovery after the loss of my two brothers and after every talk really brave people stick around and tell me about their struggles with depression and suicidal ideation.  Really brave people talk about it because they know that a shared joy is a double joy and a shared sorrow is half a sorrow.  When you share your sorrow you become real.  When you become real, you feel everything---the good and the bad.  When you hide and are fake you feel nothing.  Sorry but you are dumb and numb and the world is full of people like this.  Embrace your vulnerability and come alive.  Need scientific proof---listen to this woman on the TED stage:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o  It’s worth the 20 minutes.

“To share your weakness is to make yourself vulnerable; to make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength.”

― Criss Jami

Now back to Kid Cudi and his homies.  After his post on FB on Oct 4 a hashtag was spawned---#yougoodman hit the twitterverse as a way for brothers to speak up about mental health.  Brothers in this case meant black men, but I have a challenge for ALL men.  Can we make mental health the one issue that brings men of all colors together?  There are so many issues that divide us---too many.  Let’s make mental health colorblind and here’s why it should be a guy thing---77% of all completed suicides are males.  77%!!  Say what???  If this was 77% female, we’d all be wearing high heels every Tuesday to raise awareness, but because it’s men it tends to get swept under the rug….until now.  Every fire needs a spark.  Whether he likes it or not, Kid Cudi provided a spark with his admission and when he gets out we need to welcome him back with open arms, and I totally see that happening.  Also what I want to see happen is all men take this issue to heart and start talking about mental health out loud.  One suicide no matter what the gender is too many, but in the US we have over 42,000 suicides per year and 77% are men.  77 f*&*ing percent.  Men we are better than that!

Kid Cudi and his people----find me when you get out.  I owe you a hug!